For Better Or Worse - The
Heart Of It All: Faliqh's Story

When Faliqh’s partner collapsed on the floor, Faliqh felt his world cave in.

Watch Faliqh’s emotional story of his partner’s brush with death, and how that experience has changed both their lives, and impacted the way they think about legacy planning.
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Anxiety and panic swelled within Faliqh as he watched his partner, Kaal, collapse in front of his eyes. It was a case of cardiac arrest.

“At that point of time, I felt the whole word caving in,” he says. “I wasn’t sure what is the next step.”

As the paramedics ushered them into the hospital, Faliqh was still reeling from the horrifying image he saw earlier. “I felt really alone,” he says. “I wasn’t sure whether I should approach the family.”

The thought of losing him was the scary part.”

Faliqh

After experiencing this series of traumatising events, Faliqh starts to ponder about their legacy planning and the hurdles they have to overcome. “I told Kaal that because of this incident, we cannot take it for granted,” Although they are close to their families, sentiments may shift down the road. “When it comes to families, people may change along the process. Even if they say that by word, I’m the partner who can take of him, the family may not respect that wish,” he says.

As a Muslim, the faraid presents many difficulties for Faliqh, leaving a tricky road for the couple to navigate through. “It is a very intricate and complex issue; the law is so vague that it does not give us room to find an answer to it and that keeps us from planning ahead.”

“I thought that the secular law is very ironclad if you have your lawyer and everything,” he says. “I didn’t expect that for a Malay Muslim, the faraid still takes into effect.”

The intricacies of faraid and the added pressure of being a gay couple poses a dilemma for Faliqh as he searches for a way to distribute his assets the way he wants to. “I was hoping that I need to do more reading or reach out to more lawyers,” he says. “Maybe there is a loophole in the system.”

This prompted Faliqh to hop onto social media and start a discussion on the topic. “Are you guys even aware that the faraid applies for the Malay queer community?” he asked. The response he received shocked Faliqh as the majority was unaware about the impact faraid has.

Alarmed by this revelation, he believes that members of the community need to be more aware of their rights and be more forthcoming with the information that they possess. “I hope that anyone who has access to that information will be able to share with the community.”

Faliqh hopes that his story will get the community to start thinking about legacy planning and take it more seriously. “I believe that by sharing our stories will make an impact for the community to ask for themselves,” he says. “What is the next step for themselves? What should they do if they reach that stage?”